Category Archives: Uncategorized

Gender Violence and Discrimination

Last week on Valentine’s Day, iOppose joined millions of women around the world, in the One Billion Rising Campaign. This was a peaceful strike, using joy and dance, to stand up against the gender violence aimed at billions of women around the world.

Following on with that theme, and a story you are likely familiar with, is the violence that happened in India last December. A woman, accompanied by her boyfriend, was viciously beaten and raped on a public form of transportation, and then died 13 days later.  The officials blamed the victim for provoking her attackers. Her fault in essence was the fact that she was a woman. The Buffalo News took a deeper look and we would like to hear your comments on the situation.

http://www.buffalonews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20130217/OPINION/130219574/1122

Amazon

Donate to iOppose without paying a cent

Want to help iOppose fight sexual abuse and exploitation? Do you think you’ll be buying something off Amazon.com in the future? If you click the link below and make a purchase off Amazon, they will make a donation to us FOR you. You don’t spend a penny extra than you would if you bought the item(s) normally. If you’d like, you can even bookmark the link and any time you order through Amazon by clicking it, it will be like making a donation to iOppose. We’d love it if you did!

Shop on Amazon.com to donate to iOppose

Alternatively, the link will also be available under the “Donate” link in the navigation bar at the top of iOppose.org, so you can find it at any time.

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iOpposeTV, our YouTube Channel

iOppose will be making some big announcements soon, so we’ve spruced up our YouTube channel quite a bit. If you subscribe, you’ll get the newest iOppose announcements in video form, and it will help us to promote our organization digitally. We look forward to hearing what you think of our announcements, so be sure to sound off in the comments in the coming months!

iOppose

Fireworks

Remembering 2011

2011 was an important year for many of us, and has been the most important year so far for iOppose. We have come a long way since we began our mission in 2010. Carol, president and founder of iOppose, has given talks and presentations on sexuality and what issues we face as a society regarding it. We also threw our first fundraiser event on 11/11/11, and Carol has been featured in the Buffalo News several times regarding various issues related to sexuality.

We have a lot more in store for you in the coming weeks, and throughout 2012. If you would like to support us and help prevent sexual abuse and exploitation, please feel free to donate by clicking here. Any amount helps us, whether it’s $5 or $500. We have gotten a significant number of donations this year, and it is thrilling to see our community support us and what we do so fervently.

Donations to iOppose, Inc. will be used to educate adults about the steps they can take to prevent, recognize, and react responsibly to child sexual abuse. We will also use it to conduct workshops to equip girls with self-esteem building and critical thinking skills related to media influence on sexual attitudes and behaviors. We also strive to educate the public about healthy sexuality, and will petition the government to fund prevention and early intervention efforts.

Thank you for all your support, and we hope to hear from you in the comments with anything you’d like to add or ask. We’re always open to new ideas and love hearing from anyone about what we can and should be doing.

Happy Holidays!
The iOppose Team

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Carol in the News: Child pornography’s often forgotten victims

If you’re a subscriber to the Buffalo News, you may have noticed Carol’s appearance last week in an article concerning child pornography and pedophilia. If you missed it you can still see the full article by clicking here. From the article:

“…Conklin holds up a recent issue of People magazine in front of the group members gathered at Marie and Bill’s dining-room table. On the cover is a glossy image of a 5-year-old beauty queen. The headline asks: “Gone Too Far?” and points out that children are wearing skimpy costumes in beauty pageants.”

Why the 11th hour is near

At the end of World War I, fighting officially stopped at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month of 1918—Armistice Day was born, now known as Veteran’s Day. It was an official truce to all the fighting that claimed so many casualties. Today we are the victims of an ever-present yet unacknowledged war—the frequent bombardment of sexualized media, marketing and advertising through print, television and the internet that has robbed our youth of their innocence. We need a new truce, one that will only come by organized opposition to this war that affects all of our children and adolescents of all races and classes, creeds and beliefs, in this country and around the globe. iOppose, Inc. is willing to lead the troops in the battle against our hypersexualized culture.
iOppose, Inc. is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization founded by licensed clinical social worker and former corporate executive Carol Conklin to help prevent child sexual abuse, interrupt the early sexualization of children and adolescents, and promote intervention efforts with individuals at risk of developing deviant sexual interests. Why did she start it? Look at the following statistics:
  • Children now spend 45 hours per week with media, while only spending 30 hours per week in school and 17 hours with their parents.
  • Research has shown a strong link between media exposure and childhood obesity, smoking and sexual activity.
  • Some researchers estimate that 25% of girls and 16% of boys will experience childhood sexual abuse by the time they are 18 years old.
  • Such abuse impacts health care costs across one’s lifespan. Woman who were sexually abused as girls have 16% higher health care costs, and that becomes 36% when they experience physical abuse as well.
Much like the drug and alcohol abuse expenditures after a DWI-related accident, federal and state governments spend billions of dollars annually to apprehend, convict, incarcerate and manage sex offenders after a crime has been committed. Meanwhile, few public or private dollars are invested in addressing sex addiction and early intervention with those at risk of committing illegal sexual acts. Consider this:
  • If the U.S. spent a fraction of post-sex offense dollars on equipping the public with child abuse prevention strategies, this country would keep hundreds of thousands of potential victims from the consequences—emotional, mental and fiscal—of sexual exploitation and abuse.
  • If the U.S. spent a fraction of post-sex offense dollars on early intervention strategies for individuals at risk of illegal sexual behaviors, this country would save billions of dollars in post-sex offense expenses, and deter ordinary people from becoming perpetrators, ruining their lives and the lives of their families.
  • This is why Ms. Conklin created iOppose. This is why iOppose is hosting its kick-off party and first fundraiser on 11.11.11. This is why iOppose needs your support. Join us.
    Visit www.ioppose.org for details.

Toddlers & Tiaras

    Often we may look to the media to blame on the early sexualization of girls. In many cases, It can be appropriate to do because the overexposure of some media can impact what our society chooses to focus on.
    It seems that television is captivating audiences mainly through reality tv shows of all kinds. A huge hit across the nation is the TLC show Toddlers & Tiaras. It is a controversial reality show showcasing families taking their children, most often young girls, to compete in beauty pageants. Often these parents, referred to as “Stage Moms”, or “Stage Dads”, can be seen sparing no expense to make their child the one to beat from highlights, spray tans, to fake teeth. to. The actual pageantry is overblown. Most times these girls are seen in tiny swimsuits with fake teeth and large hair pieces. These pagents are essentially focusing on fake beauty because these girls are not physically mature enough.
    Although it is always healthy to be a competitive it seems these pageants take it to an extreme where it’s not very productive or conducive to the child’s overall self-esteem, especially because the pageant is purely based on appearance and not much else. It is important to remember to maintain normalcy in child live and to keep that childhood innocence alive through activities that allow them to thrive in their natural state.
    Click here to see the astonishing video of a child from the show getting her eyebrows waxed in preparation for the pageant.

Sex should not sell preteen clothing

“Researchers found that about 30 percent of the clothing had ‘sexualized elements’ that ‘revealed or emphasized a sexualized body part, had characteristics associated with sexiness, and/or had sexually suggestive writing.’”

Clothing is no doubt a form of expression for every individual. However, it also holds true that we can be influenced by our surroundings. The media’s obsession with appearance and vanity is nothing new and admittedly  we live in a world where we worship celebrity’s whose job is essentially to look good.
It used to be that little girls clothing usually meant a specific color and maybe a cute design.  Today the clothing has become revealing and often is created to focus on a specific body part. For example short shorts and pants with lettering on the behind are all the rage. Just look at Victoria Secrets Pink Line geared toward the pre-teen & teenage crowd.
These stores know what they are doing, they are trying to introduce a brand so when they grow older they will stay with it. Not only are clothes more “sexy” but the overall message they are sending is that girls need to start to look more adult to be accepted.
What do you think it will take for these trends to die down?

Carol in the News: Carol Conklin speaks about Rep. Anthony Weiner scandal

Another representative caught in a scandal
Buffalo, June 9, 2011: Over the past year there has been a consistent pattern of individuals in the public eye who have admitted to sexually defiant behavior. Many wonder what these men were thinking in behaving in such a manner, or what is motivating them to act in this way. Carol Conklin, a local expert on the topic of sex addiction and healthy sexuality, gives her opinion on the latest scandal surrounding politician Anthony Weiner.
“Electronic technology and the increasing use of social networking offers positive opportunities for communication. It has also created an environment for addictive or inappropriate behavior of all sorts. What may start out as an innocent interaction related to common interest, can lead to compromising personal and social values and denial of the potential consequences of the behavior to self and others.
It is important to realize that crossing relationship boundaries is not merely a bane of those in positions of power or celebrity.  These incidences are occurring all over America, damaging relationships and families by violating commonly held social norms related to interpersonal trust.  We must do more as a society to address these issues and prevent them from happening. It is necessary that we understand what constitutes healthy sexuality, how to harness our urges and impulses, and learn to make positive choices for ourselves and others.
We as a society must begin to break away from our cultural malaise and start a conversation related to sexual boundaries in our electronic age. By proactively educating our leaders and the general public about how to prevent these harmful behaviors from beginning or progressing, we can avoid the negative chain reaction.”
- Carol Conklin
Carol Conklin is a New York State licensed clinical social worker and an expert in sexual addiction assessment, evaluation & treatment. She is the President and Founder of iOppose Inc. a nonprofit organization formed to promote the prevention of sexual exploitation, including early intervention strategies with those at risk for developing sexually addictive behavior. Also, as a psychotherapist, she has helped thousands of individuals as well as couples and groups progress through the stages of healing from past trauma and current stressors related to sexual compulsivity  Ms. Conklin also provides consultant to local and national media related to sex and relationships.
If you would like to speak with Ms. Conklin in more detail about these issues, please contact the iOppose office at 716.883.6718.